Switching to a Slow Shopping Mentality
I scrolled past a beautiful skirt set the other day and started debating. So cute, but do I actually “need” it? Luckily, a lightbulb went on… 💡
For many of us making the shift to shop slower and ethically, it’s hard to shake the high rate of consumption that we’ve grown accustomed to because of fast fashion.
I’m gradually retraining my brain to approach shopping not as a repeated quick dopamine hit but as a thoughtful intentional strategy - planning what I need for the longterm rather than grabbing what looks cute spur of the moment.
When I’m thoughtfully considering one pair of jeans to wear for the next 3+ years (hopefully much longer) or a shirt that fills a gap in my closet and can be worn multiple ways for years to come, it’s easier to identify the value of the item and whether or not I truly need it for my closet and want to use my budget for it.
I have a ways to go to detach myself from bright shiny object syndrome. It reminds me of how my bible study teacher rewrote the lyrics to Arianna Grande’s “I see it. I want it. I got it,” song. Instead she said, “I want it. Don’t got it. Still happy!” And that’s the fresh perspective I want to cultivate with shopping.
As we scroll and open sale emails this week, we are going to see countless cute things. So let’s learn to appreciate a cute piece but not always “need” to add to cart.

Shopping Strategies to Survive Black Friday
- Keep a list in your phone notes of pieces you want. Countless times, adding an item to this list scratches that add to cart itch and gives me time to consider the purchase and realize either I don’t care or I actually do want to make a plan to add it to my closet in the near future.
- Use reverse girl math. Instead of doing the justification dance of it’s 50% off so I’m losing money if I don’t grab it, remember it is never a loss to give yourself more time to consider a purchase. Perhaps it will cost $20 more when you come back and decide to buy it a month from now, but being certain and sure of your purchase will help you value and use the item more which is worth it in the long run.
- Focus on core closet essentials. The best way to be strategic this Black Friday is to use it to help build a better closet instead of getting distracted by bright shiny deals. Keep your closet gaps and planned investment purchases in mind as you scan Black Friday sales.
- Hit unsubscribe.
Your inbox is getting inundated with promos this week. It’s a good time to clear some clutter and unsubscribe from retailer lists that are tempting.
The Black Friday Edit
All that being said, you can utilize Black Friday with a slow fashion mindset. My first slow fashion purchase was a pair of Chelsea boots that I was able to afford during a Black Friday sale. If you’re on a small budget but you have a list of investment pieces to add to (or update) your closet, this week can be a really strategic time to find good deals.
And on the business side, smaller ethical brands are really hurting along with the rest of retailers and many are doing deeper promotions than I’ve seen them offer ever before.
So I want to share a small handful of Black Friday sales here that on my radar.
FREE Earrings with purchase
100% of Profits go to IJM (International Justice Mission) to fight human trafficking. I wear my Sela jewelry everyday. I love their affordable ethically made capsule pieces.
Starting Black Friday
Spend $40 Get a Free Pair of Taupe Mia Earrings code: 40BF2023
Spend $75 Get a Free Pair of Gold Huggie Hoops code: 75BF2023
30% OFF
Yoga pant jeans and all the cute things at Carly Jean Los Angeles (aka CJLA). While a lot of their inventory is imported. I love that that their basics are made in the USA and their denim is created with a family manufacturing partner in Mexico. I recommend checking out their Brooke and Chrissy jeans and my most asked about loungewear - the Capri striped set.
30% OFF the site with code: EARLYBF30
(Denim sizing is a little unconventional. I take my normal even number size and then go up to the next odd number in CJLA sizing. So if you're a 6 go with a CJLA 7.)
40% OFF Sitewide!
You know I love ABLE, and I’ve never seen a sale like this! I highly recommend their denim and leather. You can’t go wrong with an ABLE jean jacket or their signature Maha Leather jacket.
Up to 70% OFF
Nisolo is known for their refined timeless boots and shoes. Shop men’s and women’s with discounts across the site. I recommend going up a half size in most boots for extra wiggle room for your toes.
Save 30-70% OFF Everything on the site + get an extra 5% OFF with code: ALEXEXTRA
Up to 70% OFF
Pact is a great place to find Fair Trade Organic Cotton basics and loungewear for women and men. Their airplane collection are some of my cozy at home go tos. I also ordered a bunch of their certified organic cotton undies for everybody's stockings this Christmas.
25% OFF
Romantic linen dresses and buttery soft leather shoes, Bali Elf makes shoes to order and produces in small batches to honor their artisans. (Their dresses run a tiny bit on the small side so consider going with your bigger size.)
Save 25% OFF everything with their biggest sale of the year code: BFELF25
60% OFF
I stumbled across this sale yesterday shopping for organic sustainably made underwear for my toddler. So I just had to share this deal for all the mamas.
60% OFF code: CYBER
30% OFF
Made in the USA with lots of organic cotton, LA Relaxed is a fantastic California based lifestyle brand. I've worn their pointelle cardigan again and again this small.
Outfits in the top half of this post are from Rowan California - a new California capsule brand made with Pima cotton grown in the USA and manufactured in LA. Save 60% OFF your first purchase of $100+ with code: ALEXGIFT
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